Everybody talks to themselves, and millions of people struggle with the toll negative self-talk takes on our minds, bodies, and relationships. But problems with self-talk vary dramatically from one person to the next, ranging from mild but persistent inner criticism to full-blown self-loathing or the pain of internalized social bias.
Based on over a decade of experience working with hundreds of individuals, psychologist and mindfulness teacher Rachel Turow offers the "self-talk workout"-six doable exercises to help you replace self-criticism with self-kindness. Strategies such as "Nonjudgment (or at least a lot less judgment)," "Fail forward," and "Spot the success" require just a few minutes a day and work together to build a cycle of positive reinforcement.
Each chapter features a "core exercise" and a section on "what does it look like when this exercise is working," encouraging your progress. Sharing stories from her own life and experiences as a psychotherapist, as well as lessons from respected public figures such as Michelle Obama and Thich Nhat Hanh, Turow shows that the burden of negative self-talk need not go on forever- the way we talk to ourselves is workable.
Self-talk matters, but what methods of building healthy self-talk actually work? This how-to guide sharesevidence-basedtechniques togo from being your own worst critic to your own best friend.
Perhaps you want to be nicer to yourself but don't really know how to get there. Or maybe you're someone who assumes self-criticism is a permanent part of your personality. Rest assured you're not alone-millions of people struggle with the toll that excessive self-criticism takeson their minds, energy levels, jobs, andrelationships. And problems with self-talk vary dramatically from one person to the next- they can appear as mild but persistent innercriticism, full-blown self-loathing, or thepainof internalizedoppression or abuse.
After over twenty years of workingwithindividuals, groups, and classes on self-criticism and related challenges, psychologist and mindfulness teacher Dr. Rachel Goldsmith Turow offers the "self-talk workout"-sixdoableexercisesthat canhelp you replace self-criticism with self-kindness and self-encouragement.Specific self-talk strategies such as"Spot the success," "Fail forward," and "Allowing all feelings, skillfully," requirejust a few minutes a day. These skills can be practiced individually totransform your self-talk, or you can choose to combine two or more exercises to enhance your self-talk workout.Each chapter features a core exercise, variations on the strategy that might feel right for you, scientific studies supporting each approach, and success stories to inspire your own practice.
Turow includesexamples from her own life and experiences as a psychotherapist, as well as lessons from her students and respected public figures such as Michelle Obama and Thich Nhat Hanh, toshow thattheburden of harsh self-criticism need not go on forever- theway that we relate to ourselves can be changed.
Everybody talks to themselves, and millions of people struggle with the toll negative self-talk takes on our minds, bodies, and relationships. But problems with self-talk vary dramatically from one person to the next, ranging from mild but persistent inner criticism to full-blown self-loathing or the pain of internalized social bias.
Based on over a decade of experience working with hundreds of individuals, psychologist and mindfulness teacher Rachel Turow offers the "self-talk workout"-six doable exercises to help you replace self-criticism with self-kindness. Strategies such as "Nonjudgment (or at least a lot less judgment)," "Fail forward," and "Spot the success" require just a few minutes a day and work together to build a cycle of positive reinforcement.
Each chapter features a "core exercise" and a section on "what does it look like when this exercise is working," encouraging your progress. Sharing stories from her own life and experiences as a psychotherapist, as well as lessons from respected public figures such as Michelle Obama and Thich Nhat Hanh, Turow shows that the burden of negative self-talk need not go on forever- the way we talk to ourselves is workable.
Self-talk matters, but what methods of building healthy self-talk actually work? This how-to guide sharesevidence-basedtechniques togo from being your own worst critic to your own best friend.
Perhaps you want to be nicer to yourself but don't really know how to get there. Or maybe you're someone who assumes self-criticism is a permanent part of your personality. Rest assured you're not alone-millions of people struggle with the toll that excessive self-criticism takeson their minds, energy levels, jobs, andrelationships. And problems with self-talk vary dramatically from one person to the next- they can appear as mild but persistent innercriticism, full-blown self-loathing, or thepainof internalizedoppression or abuse.
After over twenty years of workingwithindividuals, groups, and classes on self-criticism and related challenges, psychologist and mindfulness teacher Dr. Rachel Goldsmith Turow offers the "self-talk workout"-sixdoableexercisesthat canhelp you replace self-criticism with self-kindness and self-encouragement.Specific self-talk strategies such as"Spot the success," "Fail forward," and "Allowing all feelings, skillfully," requirejust a few minutes a day. These skills can be practiced individually totransform your self-talk, or you can choose to combine two or more exercises to enhance your self-talk workout.Each chapter features a core exercise, variations on the strategy that might feel right for you, scientific studies supporting each approach, and success stories to inspire your own practice.
Turow includesexamples from her own life and experiences as a psychotherapist, as well as lessons from her students and respected public figures such as Michelle Obama and Thich Nhat Hanh, toshow thattheburden of harsh self-criticism need not go on forever- theway that we relate to ourselves can be changed.
DR. RACHELGOLDSMITH TUROWis a psychotherapist in private practice, a research scientist, and an adjunct faculty member at Seattle University and the Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai.She has trained hundreds of individuals to use mindfulness, self-compassion, and cognitive behavioral skills to transform their self-criticism into self-encouragement and to cultivate resilience. She is the author of Mindfulness Skills for Trauma and PTSD- Practices for Recovery and Resilience as well as overthirty articles andbookchapters, and she is a frequent speaker at national and international conferences.Her website israchelturow.com.
“Rachel Turow offers simple, transformative exercises that you
will return to again and again.”
—Tara Brach, author of Trusting the Gold
“The Self-Talk Workout describes clear science-based pathways to
cultivate self-compassion. This is a great resource for anyone
looking for new sources of hope and friendliness.”
—Shauna Shapiro, author of Good Morning, I Love You: Mindfulness
and Self-Compassion Practices to Rewire Your Brain for Calm,
Clarity, and Joy
“Here you will find skillful ways to quiet the mind and open the
heart. This is good medicine.”
—Jack Kornfield, author of A Path with Heart
“If you have ever asked yourself ‘Am I good enough?’
or thought ‘I should be nicer to myself,’ then you will
want to read The Self-Talk Workout. Rachel Turow has
experienced and researched the effects of self-criticism,
and her book is written with compassion and a
basis in science.”
—Sharon Salzberg, author of Lovingkindness and Real Change
“Given the prominence of our inner voice in the economy of our
mental life, it is very fortunate that we can turn to Dr. Turow’s
wise and compassionate guidance. Some words simply jump off the
page and you can taste the relief contained in these practices. Dr.
Turow demonstrates that our inner life is more malleable than we
assume, and even a little more freedom around our self-talk can
make an enormous difference in our lives.”
—Matthew Brensilver, author of Teaching Mindfulness to Empower
Adolescents
“In The Self-Talk Workout, Rachel Turow provides an accessible,
sustainable, and scientifically-backed process to understand and to
skillfully work with the voice within that causes us so much
suffering. Turow’s comprehensive examination of the origins and
impact of self-talk on the many aspects of our lives—personally,
socially, and globally—behooves us to take action with wisdom and
compassion for the benefit of ourselves and all beings. And Rachel
is a phenomenal writer—clear and easy to follow.”
—La Sarmiento, guiding teacher of the Insight Meditation Community
of Washington BIPOC and LGBTQIA+ Sanghas
“Recommended for anyone needing techniques to pacify their inner
critic.”
—Library Journal
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